funny sayings about mom
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“I didn't fully wrap my head around the fact that there would be a person at the end of it. I read endlessly about pregnancy and what to eat and what not to eat. And then, I sort of prepared not at all for the actual baby.”
"Twelve years later, the memories of those nights, of that sleep deprivation, still make me rock back and forth a little bit. You want to torture someone? Hand them an adorable baby they love who doesn't sleep."
Sam Lawyer is a lifestyle writer and television producer based in New York City. She’s been contributing to Woman’s Day for nearly five years, and covers a variety of topics from gifting, to health, and entertainment. Her work has additionally been featured in Cosmopolitan, Country Living, and Good Housekeeping. When she’s not writing or producing, you can find her binging her favorite Bravo shows or getting walked by her French Bulldog.
Being a parent is no easy feat, but motherhood is also full of immense joy and humor. You can capture the lighthearted side of parenting with some funny mom quotes that will keep everyone smiling. A hilarious one-liner for moms makes a great addition to a card or tweet on Mother's Day, birthdays, or any day! If anyone deserves a chuckle, it's those hardworking, selfless humans who answer to "mom."
Everyone needs a laugh now and again, especially moms living in the middle of the madness that is raising humans. Laughter keeps moms focused on the fun parts of parenthood. All parents will relate to these giggle-worthy quotes.
These famous mommies know a thing or two about bringing on the laughter and raising kids. Their words and experiences are so relatable, they prove that no matter how rich and famous you are, to your children you are simply the snack fairy.
"When your children are teenagers, it's important to have a dog so that someone in the house is happy to see you." - Nora Ephron "No one told me I would be coming home in diapers, too." - Chrissy Teigen "Two year-old referred to her coat pockets as "snack holes" and this is what I shall forever call them." - Rebecca Caprara "Sleep at this point is just a concept, something I'm looking forward to investigating in the future." - Amy Poehler "It just occurred to me that the majority of my diet is made up of food that my kid didn't finish." - Carrie Underwood "If your kids are giving you a headache, follow the directions on the aspirin bottle, especially the part that says keep away from children." - Susan Savannah "I always say if you aren't yelling at your kids, you're not spending enough time with them." - Reese Witherspoon "Becoming a mom to me means you have accepted that for the next 16 years of your life, you will have a sticky purse." Nia Vardalos "Motherhood is basically finding activities for children in three-hour pockets of time for the rest of your life." - Mindy Kaling "I've conquered a lot of things ... blood clots in my lungs - twice ... knee and foot surgeries ... winning Grand Slams being down match point ... to name just a few, but I found out by far the hardest is figuring out a stroller!" - Serena Willaims
Bathroom Adventure Funny Mom Quotes
If you are a mom, well, then it's been a while since you've gone to the bathroom alone. Get a laugh out of these funny quotes about every mother's strange relationship with the bathroom.
You know you're a mom when you stop daydreaming about a million dollars and start daydreaming about how amazing it would be to go to the bathroom alone. I'm unsure when my going to the bathroom turned into a family meeting, but I should definitely contact HR. Oh wait, that's me. A mom only truly understands the meaning of rage when your child walks past everyone else in the house to find you in the bathroom to open their juice box. One of the simple pleasures of parenting is locking yourself in the bathroom with a handful of your children's Halloween candy. If you want your child's full immediate attention, try using the bathroom alone. If you stare longingly at your bathtub more than you do at your partner, you might be a mom. Nothing pairs better with a long soak, candles, and wine than a four year-old pressed against the bathroom door repeating the phrase, "Mom, are you in there!"
Funny Mom Quotes About Sleeping
All mothers know that rest and slumber is the elusive unicorn in life. You've heard tales of it, some claim to have seen it up close and personally, but you yourself have yet to witness its glory and splendor. Laugh about your sleep pains with these funny mom quotes.
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